An Extract from Frozen thoughts for this month
No single person, no single event, no single experience has the right to sit inside your head and continue to disturb the peace of your mind. No single person, no single event, no single experience should ever be given such exalted status as to have the power over the peace of your mind. For the sake of your peace, let go of anything, let go of anybody, who continue to rattle you from within the chambers of your own mind and heart. Your mind and heart should be the seat of your peace and not the seat of someone or something that keeps disturbing you. Nothing at the cost of your peace. Everything for the sake of your peace. Learn to let go, not in the physical sense, but in an emotional sense. Free your mind and heart of any disturbing elements. Let go whatever. Let go whoever. Put your peace above everything.
Your within can either be a basket of fragrant flowers or a vessel of acid? When you let go the source of your hurt, you experience an inner flowering. Else, you keep self-destructing yourself like how acid would destroy the vessel, which contains it.
People hurt you out of their ignorance and their immaturity. And, you allow yourself to be hurt out of your ignorance and your immaturity. We cannot control the ignorance and immaturity of the world. But we can do something about our side of the story. The fact of the matter is that between the hater and the hated, it is always the hater who gets hurt more. While your hatred may do nothing to the other, it certainly gives you sleepless nights, builds ulcer and acidity in you, keeps you constantly agitated, and above all, does not allow you to be at peace with yourself. So, what do you get out of living with hurt? So, what is the point in reliving hurt? Nobody gains and for sure, you definitely lose. Why will you live with something as meaningless as hurt?
In a physical sense, people or event that hurts you happen once. But you rewind and replay the hurt a zillion times. The more you process it, the deeper it hurts. The only reason you may be living with hurt is that you do not understand the value of your peace. You have given a source of disturbance a higher presence within you than your own peace. That's why I say, you allow yourself to be hurt out of your own ignorance and immaturity.
If at all anything or anybody is wrong, let them continue to live outside of you. Don't give them a presence within your mind and heart. Let your mind and heart house only those who are a source of your peace. The rest, let them go…
In letting go of your hurt, you will be letting in peace. A peaceful you is a beautiful you. The good news is, you can be beautiful. The very good news is, it is in your very hands. See… even the thought of 'let go' is getting you the smile…
------- Re produced without permission from Venkatakrishna Goluguri :P
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
I dreamed a dream from Les Miserables
I dreamed a dream in time gone by
When hope was high,
And life worth living
I dreamed that love would never die
I dreamed that God would be forgiving.
Then I was young and unafraid
When dreams were made and used,
And wasted
There was no ransom to be paid
No song unsung,
No wine untasted.
But the tigers come at night
With their voices soft as thunder
As they tear your hopes apart
As they turn your dreams to shame.
And still I dream he'll come to me
And we will live our lives together
But there are dreams that cannot be
And there are storms
We cannot weather...
I had a dream my life would be
So different from this hell I'm living
So different now from what it seems
Now life has killed
The dream I dreamed.
---- from the Musical Les Miserables
When hope was high,
And life worth living
I dreamed that love would never die
I dreamed that God would be forgiving.
Then I was young and unafraid
When dreams were made and used,
And wasted
There was no ransom to be paid
No song unsung,
No wine untasted.
But the tigers come at night
With their voices soft as thunder
As they tear your hopes apart
As they turn your dreams to shame.
And still I dream he'll come to me
And we will live our lives together
But there are dreams that cannot be
And there are storms
We cannot weather...
I had a dream my life would be
So different from this hell I'm living
So different now from what it seems
Now life has killed
The dream I dreamed.
---- from the Musical Les Miserables
Monday, April 20, 2009
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Why they love Narendra Modi
This is a country of nit-pickers. Here was Vibrant Gujarat announcing another huge haul from its latest investment spectacle when critics went into overdrive. The figures were exaggerated and most of the money had not really come in, they carped.
Reporters, celebrity columnists and political rivals quoted official statistics from varied sources and Right to Information disclosures to show up the claims of the Narendra Modi government.
Some became extremely shrill. Remember, said a Congress spokesman, how well industrialists adored Hitler. There were also references to the 2002 pogrom which took the lives of around 2,000 Muslims. But industry couldn't have cared less. This year's extravaganza, with even more of the cream of Indian business in adulatory attendance, netted promises of investments amounting to Rs 12,00,000 crore (Rs 12,000 billion) -- a colossal tribute to Modi's reputation for ruthless efficiency.
His is not the discreet charm of the accommodating politician but the irresistible attraction of a strongman who delivers. The big draw appears to be the way Modi functions: red tape has been practically banished and government departments take their cue from the chief executive.
Thus, clearances come at breathtaking speed, much to the delight of businessmen who value speed above all else. An awestruck Ratan Tata reminded the January 2009 investors' summit that the Nano project was cleared in just three days!
"I have to listen to my own saying (of 2007) that if you are not in Gujarat you are stupid. Today, I am saying that I am not stupid," the country's most iconic businessman was quoted as saying. But then Ratan Tata has special reasons for saying that.
The extremely cosy relationship that industry and the Gujarat CM enjoy raises some troubling questions.
What do the Ratan Tatas, Sunil Mittals, K V Kamaths and Ambanis see as the role of politicians? Can generous sops to industry and the speed and simplification of regulations alone be compelling reasons for the adulation of a politician with a spotty record on pursuing development goals and protecting the rights of the vulnerable sections of society? It would appear that India's business community for the most part is unable to see beyond its nose.
If not, what explains the complete indifference of these men to some shocking revelations about Modi's Gujarat that were made at the same time the Vibrant Gujarat histrionics were being played out? Top among these is that the state's record on getting its children into school and keeping them there is dismal.
The Annual Status of Education Report Rural 2008, the most telling document on education trends, shows 21 per cent of the boys and 30 per cent of girls in the 15-16 age group in rural Gujarat dropping out of school.
Worse, the younger children are simply not getting a proper education. Only 59.6 per cent rural children in the Standard 3 to 5 group could read the Standard 1 text against the all-India average of 66.6 per cent. In maths, they fared worse: only 43.1 per cent could do subtraction against the national average of 54.9 per cent, way behind the figures for Chhattisgarh and Madhya Pradesh.
Surely, something is rotten in the state of Gujarat? Perhaps, his business fan following is not aware that Gujarat under Modi has fared worse than most states on almost every index of human development, the worst blot being the dwindling sex ratio. The number of girls per 1,000 boys in Gujarat is just 878, one of the lowest in the country, despite the growing prosperity of the state -- or perhaps because of it.
The poor indices of overall human development -- Gujarat has slipped from first spot to sixth place among Indian states -- are a deeply worrying issue for social scientists who have also been sounding the alarm bells on the fragmentation and ghettoisation of Gujarat's society.
But these are not issues that find resonance in the business community. Instead, there is a belief that all is well with Modi's state. Nothing but rank ignorance could explain this very recent statement by a leading banker, who is also the head of an industry organisation, praising what he called "Gujarat's all-round development".
He says: "When I talk about Gujarat as a role model, it is not only to do with GDP growth but also other parameters like human development index, schooling, education, infrastructure and basic services. That is a model which is setting a right benchmark."
A big part of the answer as to why industry takes such a benign view of the 'Gujarat model' could be that Modi makes no bones about favouring this segment over all others. It is a model where public money is used to turn a private venture into a profitable enterprise at the cost of the environment. This is not to say that other parts of India are not similarly engaged but it is a fundamental principle with Modi.
A clear indication of this is available in a Government Resolution on the concessions made to Tata's Nano project. The GR passed on January 1, 2009, but made public just 10 days ago, is an eye-opener although there have been several speculative reports that revealed the blandishments offered by Modi to bring the Nano to Gujarat.
These make the incentives offered by the West Bengal government to the Tatas in Singur look tight-fisted. According to one estimate, tax-payers in Gujarat will be footing as much as Rs 60,000 per vehicle to make the Nano the car of the masses with a price tag of Rs 1 lakh.
It's a dream package that Modi is giving the Tatas: apart from the 1,100 acres of land and infrastructure sops, there is a soft loan of Rs 9,570 crore (Rs 95.7 billion) that is repayable over 20 years at an unbelievable 0.1 per cent rate of interest.
Facilities for solid-waste disposal and effluent treatment plants are to be developed by the state government which will also provide a dedicated power connection of 200 KW to the factory along with 14,000 cubic metres water daily. There are other dispensations, too.
The Nano project does not have to recruit 85 per cent of the workforce locally as the state industrial policy mandates.
How can one not love Modi if public money is to fund private industry to this extent? In the old days, industry was brought in to spur infrastructure and employment. That doesn't seem to be an overriding concern these days, and certainly not for Gujarat.
Attracting big-ticket industrial projects is essentially image-building that comes in handy at the time of elections. If you can get a Tata to set up the Nano factory outside Ahmedabad, does it really matter if children in the hinterland cannot read, write or count?
----
Article on Rediff.com
Written by Latha Jishnu with the same title Why they love Narendra Modi
Reporters, celebrity columnists and political rivals quoted official statistics from varied sources and Right to Information disclosures to show up the claims of the Narendra Modi government.
Some became extremely shrill. Remember, said a Congress spokesman, how well industrialists adored Hitler. There were also references to the 2002 pogrom which took the lives of around 2,000 Muslims. But industry couldn't have cared less. This year's extravaganza, with even more of the cream of Indian business in adulatory attendance, netted promises of investments amounting to Rs 12,00,000 crore (Rs 12,000 billion) -- a colossal tribute to Modi's reputation for ruthless efficiency.
His is not the discreet charm of the accommodating politician but the irresistible attraction of a strongman who delivers. The big draw appears to be the way Modi functions: red tape has been practically banished and government departments take their cue from the chief executive.
Thus, clearances come at breathtaking speed, much to the delight of businessmen who value speed above all else. An awestruck Ratan Tata reminded the January 2009 investors' summit that the Nano project was cleared in just three days!
"I have to listen to my own saying (of 2007) that if you are not in Gujarat you are stupid. Today, I am saying that I am not stupid," the country's most iconic businessman was quoted as saying. But then Ratan Tata has special reasons for saying that.
The extremely cosy relationship that industry and the Gujarat CM enjoy raises some troubling questions.
What do the Ratan Tatas, Sunil Mittals, K V Kamaths and Ambanis see as the role of politicians? Can generous sops to industry and the speed and simplification of regulations alone be compelling reasons for the adulation of a politician with a spotty record on pursuing development goals and protecting the rights of the vulnerable sections of society? It would appear that India's business community for the most part is unable to see beyond its nose.
If not, what explains the complete indifference of these men to some shocking revelations about Modi's Gujarat that were made at the same time the Vibrant Gujarat histrionics were being played out? Top among these is that the state's record on getting its children into school and keeping them there is dismal.
The Annual Status of Education Report Rural 2008, the most telling document on education trends, shows 21 per cent of the boys and 30 per cent of girls in the 15-16 age group in rural Gujarat dropping out of school.
Worse, the younger children are simply not getting a proper education. Only 59.6 per cent rural children in the Standard 3 to 5 group could read the Standard 1 text against the all-India average of 66.6 per cent. In maths, they fared worse: only 43.1 per cent could do subtraction against the national average of 54.9 per cent, way behind the figures for Chhattisgarh and Madhya Pradesh.
Surely, something is rotten in the state of Gujarat? Perhaps, his business fan following is not aware that Gujarat under Modi has fared worse than most states on almost every index of human development, the worst blot being the dwindling sex ratio. The number of girls per 1,000 boys in Gujarat is just 878, one of the lowest in the country, despite the growing prosperity of the state -- or perhaps because of it.
The poor indices of overall human development -- Gujarat has slipped from first spot to sixth place among Indian states -- are a deeply worrying issue for social scientists who have also been sounding the alarm bells on the fragmentation and ghettoisation of Gujarat's society.
But these are not issues that find resonance in the business community. Instead, there is a belief that all is well with Modi's state. Nothing but rank ignorance could explain this very recent statement by a leading banker, who is also the head of an industry organisation, praising what he called "Gujarat's all-round development".
He says: "When I talk about Gujarat as a role model, it is not only to do with GDP growth but also other parameters like human development index, schooling, education, infrastructure and basic services. That is a model which is setting a right benchmark."
A big part of the answer as to why industry takes such a benign view of the 'Gujarat model' could be that Modi makes no bones about favouring this segment over all others. It is a model where public money is used to turn a private venture into a profitable enterprise at the cost of the environment. This is not to say that other parts of India are not similarly engaged but it is a fundamental principle with Modi.
A clear indication of this is available in a Government Resolution on the concessions made to Tata's Nano project. The GR passed on January 1, 2009, but made public just 10 days ago, is an eye-opener although there have been several speculative reports that revealed the blandishments offered by Modi to bring the Nano to Gujarat.
These make the incentives offered by the West Bengal government to the Tatas in Singur look tight-fisted. According to one estimate, tax-payers in Gujarat will be footing as much as Rs 60,000 per vehicle to make the Nano the car of the masses with a price tag of Rs 1 lakh.
It's a dream package that Modi is giving the Tatas: apart from the 1,100 acres of land and infrastructure sops, there is a soft loan of Rs 9,570 crore (Rs 95.7 billion) that is repayable over 20 years at an unbelievable 0.1 per cent rate of interest.
Facilities for solid-waste disposal and effluent treatment plants are to be developed by the state government which will also provide a dedicated power connection of 200 KW to the factory along with 14,000 cubic metres water daily. There are other dispensations, too.
The Nano project does not have to recruit 85 per cent of the workforce locally as the state industrial policy mandates.
How can one not love Modi if public money is to fund private industry to this extent? In the old days, industry was brought in to spur infrastructure and employment. That doesn't seem to be an overriding concern these days, and certainly not for Gujarat.
Attracting big-ticket industrial projects is essentially image-building that comes in handy at the time of elections. If you can get a Tata to set up the Nano factory outside Ahmedabad, does it really matter if children in the hinterland cannot read, write or count?
----
Article on Rediff.com
Written by Latha Jishnu with the same title Why they love Narendra Modi
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Are You Just A Product of Your Environment?
Most people don't particularly like the idea that they are merely products of their environment. But whether the suggestion in the title appeals to you or not, it describes the situation for most people pretty accurately. Most of our thoughts, emotions, actions, behaviors and habits are dictated directly or indirectly by our environment.
There may be a few exceptional individuals for whom this doesn't seem to be the case. People with such a strong character that they appear to be impervious to influences of the circumstances around them. However even these people are under the influence of their environment Their past environment has shaped them in such a way that they have gotten stronger and are more able today to withstand certain influences. But even though they may have developed an unshakable character they are still not untouchable. They can however be highly selective as to by what and whom they allow themselves to be influenced. They have learned to stand guard at the door of their minds, and that is a major reason for their success.
We would all like to think of ourselves as such a person and we all have the ability to be just that. But hanging around people who are just about the opposite, in other words: most people, won't do much good. It's not that much a question of whether or not you are a product of your environment. The question is : Do you like what your environment has made of you?" Or even better, and certainly more accurate: "Do you like what you have allowed your environment to make of you?" If you do. Great! If not. You basically have two options; change how and when you allow your environment to influence you or change your environment. The former might seem easier, since it allows you to stay within your comfort zone, but it is in fact a lot harder than you might think. After all, if it were that easy you would already have done it.
Changing your environment can be easy enough, but it does take a conscious decision on your part. Your 'environment' or your 'peer group' usually consists of about five people. These are the people that you spend the majority of your time with and these are also the people that influence you the most. Like it or not. So if you're not satisfied with your results and you would like to change where you are in life, a change in your environment may be the smartest first step to take. The expectations put on you by your peers have a huge impact on you, whether you are aware of it or not. If you hang around people who hold themselves to high standards you will do your best to meet those standards. Even if this means you will have to put a higher demand on yourself. Conversely, if the people around you have a lower standard you will inevitably either lower your standards to remain comfortable around them or you will leave them. Unfortunately for many people the former, which is obviously the path of least resistance, is often the alternative of choice.
You could make achieving your goals and reaching success in life so much easier if you would just be a bit more choosy when it comes to the people in your environment. Take an active role in determining who is and who is not allowed into your peer group. Instead of just letting other people claim you for theirs. To some this may seem like a chore; consciously selecting who they spend their time with or posing as somebody else and pretending to be something they're not in order to fit in. A lot of people also consider it to be unethical or opportunistic to apply this kind of selectiveness to determine who they spend their time with. Many people also mistake being selective in who you spend your time with for being insincere. As if you were taking advantage of someone else by spending time with them. Of course if you actually try to take advantage of someone, he or she will notice this sooner or later and when that happens, that person will no longer be a part of your peer group. However, if you sincerely want to get ahead in life there is nothing wrong with looking for people that can increase you chances of success.
The good thing about being around like-minded individuals is that you enjoy each others company because you think alike on at least a number of subjects that you both consider to be important. These people won't feel exploited by you at all. They'll probably enjoy your company as much as you do theirs. And you will have a lot less trouble filtering all sorts of negative influences from these people. Simply because they won't give you a lot of it. They may give you a lot of constructive criticism or hold you to higher standards than you are used to, but they aren't likely to crush your hopes and dreams and try to de-motivate you. If you have a carefully selected peer group it's as if you have a whole team of security guards protecting the door to your mind instead of just one.
Of course this doesn't mean that you can't still spend time with the people you currently hang around. These people may still be very important to you. They may be close friends and family and by no means should you completely erase them from your life. Although in some cases that might not be a bad suggestions. It is important to realize that continuing to devote most of your time, attention and energy to them can seriously hurt you and your future. As the expression goes: "Love your family, Choose your peers". If you really want to get ahead in life you better take that phrase to heart. After all, time is a very precious commodity of which all of us are only given a certain amount. We might as well spend it in an environment that is supportive to our goals and dreams
------ By Charles Hopkins (http://www.ezilon.com/articles/articles/5151/1/Are-You-Just-A-Product-of-Your-Environment%3F)
There may be a few exceptional individuals for whom this doesn't seem to be the case. People with such a strong character that they appear to be impervious to influences of the circumstances around them. However even these people are under the influence of their environment Their past environment has shaped them in such a way that they have gotten stronger and are more able today to withstand certain influences. But even though they may have developed an unshakable character they are still not untouchable. They can however be highly selective as to by what and whom they allow themselves to be influenced. They have learned to stand guard at the door of their minds, and that is a major reason for their success.
We would all like to think of ourselves as such a person and we all have the ability to be just that. But hanging around people who are just about the opposite, in other words: most people, won't do much good. It's not that much a question of whether or not you are a product of your environment. The question is : Do you like what your environment has made of you?" Or even better, and certainly more accurate: "Do you like what you have allowed your environment to make of you?" If you do. Great! If not. You basically have two options; change how and when you allow your environment to influence you or change your environment. The former might seem easier, since it allows you to stay within your comfort zone, but it is in fact a lot harder than you might think. After all, if it were that easy you would already have done it.
Changing your environment can be easy enough, but it does take a conscious decision on your part. Your 'environment' or your 'peer group' usually consists of about five people. These are the people that you spend the majority of your time with and these are also the people that influence you the most. Like it or not. So if you're not satisfied with your results and you would like to change where you are in life, a change in your environment may be the smartest first step to take. The expectations put on you by your peers have a huge impact on you, whether you are aware of it or not. If you hang around people who hold themselves to high standards you will do your best to meet those standards. Even if this means you will have to put a higher demand on yourself. Conversely, if the people around you have a lower standard you will inevitably either lower your standards to remain comfortable around them or you will leave them. Unfortunately for many people the former, which is obviously the path of least resistance, is often the alternative of choice.
You could make achieving your goals and reaching success in life so much easier if you would just be a bit more choosy when it comes to the people in your environment. Take an active role in determining who is and who is not allowed into your peer group. Instead of just letting other people claim you for theirs. To some this may seem like a chore; consciously selecting who they spend their time with or posing as somebody else and pretending to be something they're not in order to fit in. A lot of people also consider it to be unethical or opportunistic to apply this kind of selectiveness to determine who they spend their time with. Many people also mistake being selective in who you spend your time with for being insincere. As if you were taking advantage of someone else by spending time with them. Of course if you actually try to take advantage of someone, he or she will notice this sooner or later and when that happens, that person will no longer be a part of your peer group. However, if you sincerely want to get ahead in life there is nothing wrong with looking for people that can increase you chances of success.
The good thing about being around like-minded individuals is that you enjoy each others company because you think alike on at least a number of subjects that you both consider to be important. These people won't feel exploited by you at all. They'll probably enjoy your company as much as you do theirs. And you will have a lot less trouble filtering all sorts of negative influences from these people. Simply because they won't give you a lot of it. They may give you a lot of constructive criticism or hold you to higher standards than you are used to, but they aren't likely to crush your hopes and dreams and try to de-motivate you. If you have a carefully selected peer group it's as if you have a whole team of security guards protecting the door to your mind instead of just one.
Of course this doesn't mean that you can't still spend time with the people you currently hang around. These people may still be very important to you. They may be close friends and family and by no means should you completely erase them from your life. Although in some cases that might not be a bad suggestions. It is important to realize that continuing to devote most of your time, attention and energy to them can seriously hurt you and your future. As the expression goes: "Love your family, Choose your peers". If you really want to get ahead in life you better take that phrase to heart. After all, time is a very precious commodity of which all of us are only given a certain amount. We might as well spend it in an environment that is supportive to our goals and dreams
------ By Charles Hopkins (http://www.ezilon.com/articles/articles/5151/1/Are-You-Just-A-Product-of-Your-Environment%3F)
Friday, January 02, 2009
Stray thoughts !
People reading this just don’t scratch your head. Just don’t rip off your hairs. I guess lack of sleep does this to people :)
I was having strange thoughts about how human mind works. My head had all the racing thoughts that are your emotions connected to your head. Or is it the vice versa. For many people the difference in both the thoughts may not be visible. For many it becomes a way of life. For many it is important that there emotions be in line with what they think. For many it is all about getting your mind to think and rationalize your emotions. Well confused people won’t find an answer here. I go by the latter view. Not many people are gonna agree with it. After all who imagines a guy saying this! Who imagines a supposedly tough person saying that emotions sometimes run what you think. But anyways not touching the line of female empowerment ;-) I would like to say Gimme a break damn it ! I am vulnerable too !
I have a strong belief that the societal belief of males being strong ain’t correct in totality. I would just say that control over their emotions maybe a tiny winy bit more in guys. But then maybe this too is driven by society. Afterall a crying male is a laughing stalk and a crying female is supposedly having some trouble. Though it maybe just that loss of nail polish or that much carefully grown nail but if she is crying there is nothing weird about it. Sigh ! that’s how the world works. That’s how we develop sciences. We develop psychology of people. We develop emotional and mental profiles.
Damn, people actually do there doctorates in these and are actually right. Believe me this is what I wanted to write about. How predictable we are! And when we do something out of the way it becomes adventure.
But my mind counter questions me. Is everything being predictable good ?
And that is where my mind crops up with all the negatives and positives, pros and cons about the whole idea.
After all isn’t it predictability based on which people create psychological profiles. Well so many heinous crimes are saved just by the correct way that psychologists are able to create the criminal profiles. Ever wondered why a serial killer always has a style. I mean what kind of nut would do the same thing in the similar manner so that a spectacled psychologist in an air conditioned room can just create a profile on him. But sadly enough this is true. It happens this way. For serious people, my apologies here for my knowledge about this profiling is just based on movies J
But then isn’t this same predictability results in the sweetest thing in the world. For instance the fact that what is right and what is wrong for a gift to the girl you wanna woo. Or for that matter how your girlfriend may react in a certain situation.
And how do people work their intuitions here. Maybe by knowing there target more. By doing what she expect and when she expect.
Believe me 99% surprises are surprises because they are meant to be happy. A bad news is never a surprise. It is rationalized with your thoughts that you knew somewhere this would happen.
Hell lets bring down the percentage to 85 % and leave the 15% to really sadistic people who always bring bad surprises. And believe me when someone wrote that One should be prepared for all eventualities he was thinking of all these 15 % situations.
But from where I see you always have in mind that this thing, this not so good a thing may happen. But then your heart doesn’t goes along with your mind. And finally we are able to convince our minds saying a single word – Maybe not ! (pardon me they became two words :D)
But thinking of it positively this Maybe not is the single driving force behind many. After all it is what I call as the Ray of hope when it is dark everywhere. For instance after analyzing all the practical situations and so called political correctness in my team I realized I won’t get a good grade but then that Maybe not kept me driving till the day I got that bad surprise.
But still at times predictability sucks big time. Specially when we can’t do anything about it. It instills that constant fear. After all what is fear. Ain’t it the predictability of something going wrong! On the war front the predictability of getting hit by a bullet, on the personal front the predictability of loss. Predictability of failing when not studying for a test to predictability of loosing money the wrong way.
But then how far does this fear helps. I think very little. Because this is the exact place where we convince and rationalize our thoughts to kick away those negative possibilities. And it is this way that we get a sad surprise.
One more example, all your loved ones are gonna go away someday. But then why fear losing them. Perhaps the Maybe not factor is to high in all of us. Our parents are gonna die someday but then still that sense of loss and grief is so real. Afterall everyone including me never want this to happen. But an early death, an untimely death is something that really tears a person apart. I asked myself why does this happen. I did not get an answer. I think maybe we have never prepared ourself for this. We did not have the Maybe not factor for this.
We feel sad when something happens not because it happened but more because we did not want it to happen. Being predictable is the way of life.
Believe me it may seem tough but if we are deep into a situation, if we know the person very well it just becomes so predictable what he or she will do next. This single philosophy is the bread and butter of all the psychologists of this world !
Its this single thought that helps them give therapy to estranged people, to draw philosophies from conflict.
Believe me when I say the wars with the guns are never successful, the war on the ideologies are what yield a winner.
But then what makes a person happy. The conventional wisdom of elders saying that you think first or the truth that you feel first.
I don’t have an answer. I believe that in most of the situations we let our emotions run high. We let our mind rationalize that what we are thinking is right. Which gives arise to two questions: what is a conflict and what is a compromise.
I believe conflict arises when two people are not able to convince each other with there emotions. When they are not able to rationalize there feelings on a common ground. And this is where compromise comes in. Compromise is nothing but conditioning your head to think that you are doing something against your emotions for something better however much materialistic it maybe. Isn’t professionalism truly is doing compromise to satisfy your materialistic needs.
True happiness really comes in when what you do think and feel are in line. And this process gotta be controlled by feelings only for I do not see a way out of feeling differently. You feel, you feel. And that’s what all of us do. We rationalize with what we are feeling, or to put it another way we bring our thoughts to what we feel. And that is how people are predictable. For what it is worth, they may have done a different assessment about themselves if they were not them. And that is why so many psychologists earn !
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